Top 50 Signs You're A Mark
1.) Your whole wardrobe is made up of Austin 3:16 shirts.
2.) You went and bought a computer and a connection to the internet just to get wrestling news and say you're not a mark.
3.) When Hulk Hogan started the nWo you traded in your vitamins for a black marker to color all of your Hulk Hogan merchandise black, representing the nWo.
4.) If you're watching Nitro and you know Glacier is on next, you grab some hot chocolate, put on a winter jacket, and prepare for the snow to fall in the arena. The extra jacket is sometimes not needed because you are so excited to see Glacier.
5.) You make signs to hold up in front of your television screen while watching RAW is WAR.
6.) You wonder if somehow Kane is gonna beat the Hardy Boys.
7.) You're glad there were fifteen minutes left before Survivor Series '97 should have been over because you got to take off your Bret Hart shirt, home made Bret Hart glasses, go up to your room to take down your twenty Bret Hart posters, put away your Bret Hart figures, and still have the time to ask yourself: I thought Bret was a good wrestler but he submitted to the sharpshooter.
8.) When you walk into a room, you get your tape player out and play your favorite wrestler's theme song and give proper introductions to yourself before walking into the room.
9.) You bought a second house just so you could place another entry to win the Steve Austin truck.
10.) Your Christmas list contained everything in the WWF catalog.
11.) Every time Sting flies down from the top of an arena and goes through the mat you hope he's ok.
12.) Every week on RAW is WAR you get very mad when the power goes out. You later find out that it was Kane.
13.) When provoked, you give your tormentor the Stone Cold "rolling middle fingers."
14.) When you see your mom or girlfriend, you feel the urge to yell "HO!!!!!!" just like "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan.
15.) You finish sentences by saying, "...and that's the bottom line!"
16.) Whenever you see a fight, you scream "ECW! ECW! ECW!"
17.) You legitimately feel sorry for The Undertaker because you believe that he is really fighting his brother, his parents really died and he was betrayed by his life-long friend, Paul Bearer.
18.) You have no idea why Pat Patterson sucks, after all, he was the first Intercontinental Champion! (insert Al Snow joke here).
19.) You actually enjoy it when Eric Bischoff and Vince McMahon wrestle.
20.) You wonder whatever happened to Dr. Isaac Yankem D.D.S., Oz, The Diamond Studd, Mean Mark Callous, Avatar, Leif Cassidy, and Papa Shango.
21.) You think that there have been multiple Ultimate Warriors.
22.) You think that Hulk Hogan is the World Champion because he is the best wrestler alive today.
23.) You see a "good guy" and a "bad guy" hanging out together and you ask them why.
24.) You cried during Shawn Michaels speech where he said that he lost his smile.
25.) You voted for Bob Backlund during the Presidential elections.
26.) While practicing DX's crotch chop, you injure yourself.
27.) You get angry when the Nitro main event doesn't end cleanly (without interference).
28.) When Scott Hall takes a survey you say "N-W-O" at home with him, then cheer.
29.) You love all three of the Mick Foley triplets, Dude Love, Mankind, and Cactus Jack.
30.) You wait to hear how the crowd reacts to a wrestler before you react (cheer/boo).
31.) You stopped watching wrestling for a couple of years, then go to a WWF Show and hold a Hulkamania sign up, and wonder where he is.
32.) You drink beer with The Sandman at home.
33.) You look on a map for Dudleyville.
34.) You think you can actually smell what The Rock is cooking... and you like it.
35.) You wonder how many years of bad luck Steve Austin has due to the start of his theme music.
36.) Every time DX comes out, you say "Suck what???!!!"
37.) Every time someone brings up the subject of "Macho Man" Randy Savage and Miss Elizabeth you respond "Damnit, I don't hear you!! They are still married!!"
38.) You think Alex Wright or Disco Inferno can actually dance.
39.) You think the reforming of the Four Horsemen without Ric Flair is a good idea.
40.) You're still waiting for Koko B. Ware, The Brooklyn Brawler, and Hillbilly Jim to all get their respective shots at the WWF Title.
41.) You actually respond to K-Dawg's "Arriba la raza" as if it's the start of a conversation.
42.) When Triple H asks "Are you ready?!?!", you say "No" and ask for more time.
43.) You think WCW is better than the WWF.
44.) You're amazed at how many people chant "GOLDBERG! GOLDBERG!" in perfect unison and how loud it gets and how it sounds the same each and every time.
45.) You can actually list all 1,000 of Dean Malenko's holds.
46.) You answer the phone with "Hey yo."
47.) You actually think Goldberg deserves to hold the WCW Title.
48.) You like to watch Norman Smiley do the "big wiggle."
49.) You think Gangrel is really a vampire and drinks blood.
50.) You think Kane has magic powers and can make pyro come out of the ring posts whenever he wants.